Sunday, November 23, 2014

Now That I'm a Mom

I used to be able to recite the movie Pretty Women almost by heart and knew all the words to all the songs in Dirty Dancing,

Now that I’m a mom,

I can quote lines form Cars and Toy Story and know the names of many of the non-leading characters.

I used to dance in clubs or bars, usually surrounded by a group of girlfriends and a drink or cigarette in my hand,

Now that I’m a mom,

I dance in the middle of the kitchen, with toddlers, whose sweet moves include spinning around in circles til you fall, and a spatula in my hand while I take breaks to mix dinner on the stove.

I used to drive a car to and from work, the back seat pretty much useless and empty, 

Now that I’m a mom,

I drive a van to and from school and Target and Starbucks, the back filled with car seats and back packs and crushed animal crackers and strollers

I used to think cleaning my house was a never ending, thankless, crappy job that I put off til the mess got so bad I could no longer ignore it,

Now that I’m a mom,

Every. Single. Day. the mess is so bad I can no longer ignore it. I still think it is a never ending, thankless, crappy job though. 

I used to go days without eating a fruit or veggie. I ate in front of the TV watching Judge Judy. I was a stubborn, picky eater who didn't like to try new things,

Now that I’m a mom,

I eat my meals at the kitchen table, with my kids and husband and serve a fruit and veggie with every lunch and dinner. I mean, I'm in no way the model for healthy eating (one word, McDonald's) but now I will actually eat a salad or strawberry (in my earlier years I would not touch either of those things) so that my kids will try it too.

I used to have the mouth of sailor. I could drop f bombs left and right. I never said f bomb. I said fuck,
Now that I’m a mom,

I say things like, fudge, son of a biscuit, oh my goodness, crap, f bomb, effing.

I used love the TV show Sex and the City,

Now that I’m a mom,

I mostly watch PBS kids.

I used to dream about having a family of my own,

Now that I’m a mom,

Having a family tops any experience I’ve ever had before.


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